The Neighbor’s Daughter: Can I Borrow a Cup of Spunk

Mia Manarote twirling a baton for a full minute before anything else happens. It’s like watching the Soviet version of Solaris if it were about a slutty teen instead of a mysterious planet. A guy sneaks into the yard where she’s sitting, which he doesn’t need to do, because when she sees him, she’s not surprised and she welcomes his groping hands. Mia is sleek, raven-haired, cute, and Czech. I have no idea where the guy is from or what his deal is, but he’s kind of a slug. He kind of pokes at her holes with the baton, but never puts it in her. She’s the real draw here, and she does all the work of getting him to pop on her face.

Candy Sweet is a tall, lanky-looking brunette who wanders in hand in hand with a slightly taller guy, and they start kissing and undressing each other, which doesn’t take long because they’re not really wearing very much. At least in the first scene, there was a neighborhood visible, and you could assume there was some kind of neighbor thing going on, but these two are just in a bedroom getting it on. Candy, who has also gone by the presumably sexy-in-Eastern-Europe name of Toka Sparnem, manages to ignore the fact that someone is either drilling holes somewhere nearby in the house or has left a vibrating cell phone on a table long enough to get in the mood to 69 with Rikard and let him bounce her around the bed. This scene is so full of odd little noises that I couldn’t even concentrate on the sex.

I can’t shake the feeling that someone is playing games here, because we keep abandoning elements of the Neighbor’s Daughter theme; Jessie Jazz, whose main porn name appears to be Jessie Hazz but has also performed as Jessie Jaxx, is a hard-looking Czech blonde who is busily engaged in playing War, the simplest card game in the world, not the popular Warsaw Pact political solution, out on the back deck with a guy who is about the same age as she is, which is an age at which you pretty much have your own identity instead of being anybody’s daughter. They concentrate admirably on the game, given that there are several other conversations going on within earshot, and when it ends, they concentrate admirably on the sex, in spite of those same conversations continuing on. Somebody within about ten yards just doesn’t care that Jessie Jazz is getting fucked on the back deck. So it’s probably not mom’s house. Also, for some reason, there are a lot of crickets chirping in the middle of the day. Seriously, crickets? And usually, crickets stop at loud noises, but when Jessie comes, they just keep on. Even when it sounds like someone on a riding mower is driving by. Oh, and then there’s a surprise. I won’t spoil it by telling you what it is, but I will say that if you really came to this movie for the neighbor aspect, you might want to fast forward after the cum shot.

Ennie Sweet, who is Czech, brunette, and cute, and who has also performed under the names Lilly Klass, Sindy Black, Xenia, Zena Little, Marina, Alina, Zuzana, and Erika, fucks a guy in a bedroom. Seriously, you are welcome to really go to town using your imagination about how this can be interpreted as a Neighbor’s Daughter scenario. If you figure it out, by all means let me know.